How Black Men and Women Can Build Trusting Relationships
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"Men definitely want a woman by their side who has their best interest at heart. However, there is a fine line between having someone's best interest at heart and aggressively forcing your agenda on someone. If a man has made it abundantly clear, in his actions if not his words, that the topic you've decided is crucial enough to revisit countless times means nothing to him, give up. He is not ready to deal with it. He might not say that in so many words, but key into his non-verbal clues. If he seems to shut down completely when you bring up a subject matter then maybe you should back away a bit.
If it's something that you can't put off, try a different tactic. Draw him out by beginning the conversation with a question... Nobody likes to feel as though they are being spoken at, rather than being spoken to; and a question makes it clear that you really want to hear his thoughts."
-from the book, The Conversation by Hill Harper
He inspired young men and women to face obstacles and realize their dreams. Now, inspired by the strength and success of the marriage of his college friend, Barack Obama, bestselling author Hill Harper tackles the crisis in African-American relationships in his first book for adults. He opens a dialog on relationship essentials including:
§ the dating scene
§ the myth that there are no mature, single, black male professionals
§ how women can let go of the “heaviness” they sometimes attach to dating
§ how men can break the “player” cycle
§ the difference between sex and intimacy
§ bridging the communication gap and more
It’s sure to become his most healing contribution to Black America yet.
Hardcover Book : 192 pages
Publisher: Gotham Books, Penguin Putnam Inc ( September 08, 2009 )
Item #: 12-800183
Product Dimensions: 5.125 x 7.5 x 0.75inches
Product Weight: 11.0 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
I found this to be a very easy read and quite enlightening. It made we take a step back and think about my past relationships. Wow!!! This book is truly a must read for everyone. Thank you Hill Harper!!!
I must say that so far, this book has been very interesting! It's refreshing to see the many point of views on black relationships. I'm trying to get my boyfriend to read this book, I think we could both benefit from reading this selection...if it weren't for work (in the desert) I'd probably be done reading it by now! Thanks Hill for your interesting perspective!
I'm really enjoying the book! I encouraged my boyfriend to read the book with me so we both have copies of the book. We're talking about each chapter together and just being open with each other about how we feel. It's been the basis for our conversation and has helped me better understand my boyfriend's point of view, or at least made me knowledgeable. I also asked a guy friend of mine some of the questions provided and received some very interesting answers. I've realized that there are some good Black men out there and I've been blessed to have a few in my life. The book helped me realize that. :)
Hill Harper addresses common misconceptions and stereotypes we in the Black Community have either heard or experienced first hand. In "The Conversation" he looks at the reasons why, how to identify our issues and take steps to acknowledge and address the need to fix ourselves and our attitudes to build and strengthen our communication and dialogue with Black men and Black Women. Good read.
This book opens up the mind to many factors that some people don't stop to think about and it shows how loving, trusting and understanding relationships can be developed....Hill did a fantastic job on relaying the thoughts of both men and women in this book....very deep and inspiring book....absolutely loved it!!